Cons Of Curses
Cons Of Curses * Season #: 7 * Season Ep #: 6 * Overall Ep #: 112 Summary Cotton Puffy overhears a bad word from Mr. Rainbow and he uses it in front of Vanilla Cake and Caramel Cider. Episode Note: Throughout the episode, many bits of dialogue are obscured by many sound effects. The sound effects and bold and in between dashes. (Opening shot; fade in to the kitchen of the Rainbow House. Dirty pots and pans are stacked everywhere, and we can hear other dishes being shuffled o.c. A small TV sits in the foreground, next to the sink with its screen turned away from the camera, and a female voice is heard.) * [Host] (on TV) "All righty, it's almost time to put that turkey in the oven." (Mr. Rainbow hustles across the screen—he is the source of the clatter and mess, and he has put on an apron. A large turkey rests on a platter in his hands. The next several lines overlap.) * [Mr. Rainbow] "Turkey in the oven." * [Host] (on TV) "Next we tackle the vegetable stuffing. Now take those veggies and--" * [Mr. Rainbow] (hustling across) "Right, veggies...Hold on!" (More rattling of utensils.) * [Host] (on TV) "—julienne them like so. Not very difficult. Now mix them in with the tomato coulis we prepared earlier." (On the end of this, he crosses the kitchen again, this time with an armload of vegetables in tow. The distinct sound of creaking metal from the oven’s general direction combines with his next words to obscure the start of the host’s next sentence.) * [Mr. Rainbow] (now o.s.) "We prepared that earlier?" (He backs into view.) * [Host] (on TV) "—and stuff it into the turkey." * [Mr. Rainbow] (puzzled) "What? Bu-but it's in the oven already!" * [Host] (on TV) "See how easy it goes in? Everything should be running just smooth as silk." (There is an o.c. explosion—the oven just gave up the ghost—that obscures her next few words.) * [Mr. Rainbow] "Uh oh." * [Host] (on TV) "Make sure you don’t set that temperature too high, or you’ll be putting out a three-alarm fire. All right, now sit yourself down and enjoy a nice cold beverage—" (During the previous line, Mr. Rainbow zips o.s. away from the oven, then back toward it with a fire extinguisher. White clouds of carbon dioxide vapor drift back into view as he uses the thing. Cut to outside the kitchen door; smoke billows into the hallway as his panicked shriek rings out. Pan/tilt up to the door of the playroom, then cut to inside. Vanilla Cake floats up into view, with a building block in hand aimed for the top of a tower.) * [Vanilla Cake] "Hey, somebody go down and see if dinner’s ready. I’m hungry." (He places the block; cut to Caramel on the bed reading.) * [Caramel Cider] "I'm busy. You go." * [Vanilla Cake] "No, you go!" * [Caramel Cider] "No, you!" * [Vanilla Cake] "You!" * [Caramel Cider] "You!" * [Vanilla Cake] "You!" * [Caramel Cider] "You!" * [Vanilla Cake] "Ugh! Fine!" (adding another block) "Cotton, you go." (The party brother is lying on the floor and working intently on a balloon animal shape.) * [Cotton Puffy] "I can't. I'm in the zone!" * [Vanilla Cake] "Okay, then." (tossing another block away) "Let's rock-paper-scissor for it." (Close-up of a point between the three. Each reaches one hand into view and shakes it during the count of the next line.) * [All three] (from o.s.) "One...two...three!" * [Caramel Cider] (from o.s.) "Scissors beats paper!" * [Vanilla Cake] (from o.s.) "Ha! You lose, Cotton." (Shift to frame all three.) "Now go see what’s for dinner." * [Cotton Puffy] "I always lose at this game!" (Back to the kitchen. A pot of something is boiling on the stove. During the next line, Mr. Rainbow runs across with another armload of vegetables.) * [Host] (on TV) "All right, let’s turn up the heat, shall we?" * [Mr. Rainbow] (from o.s.) "No, please!" (A great commotion; the veggies fly back into view, and he returns to the stove.) * [Host] (on TV) "Time to check that sauce." * [Mr. Rainbow] "Sauce. Right." (He shoots out one hand and grabs the pot’s handle. The sizzle of flesh on metal does not immediately register in his brain—but after a second his eyes bug out and he sinks his teeth into his lower lip to stifle a scream. Everything he ever learned about heat transfer has just come back to him in one agonizing instant. Finally he pulls free and regards his steaming appendage.) * [Mr. Rainbow] "HOLY '--TEA-KETTLE WHISTLING--'!!" (Cut to the boiling kettle on the stove. Pull back to frame the unfortunate man, sucking frantically at his scalded fingers—and Cotton Puffy, floating unnoticed behind him. His face betrays his complete shock at what he has just overheard.) (Back to the playroom. As Caramel continues reading and Vanilla waits impatiently with another block in hand, Cotton floats along the balcony to the doorway. His expression has not changed.) * [Vanilla Cake] "Hey, Cotton. What's for dinner?" * [Caramel Cider] "Hey, Cotton...Cotton?" (He floats across the room, paying no heed, and stops near Vanilla and the tower of blocks.) * [Vanilla Cake] "Hel-lo? Jupiter to Cotton! Dinner?" (Cut to the balloon animal of a dog on the floor.) * [Vanilla Cake] (from o.s.) "Cotton? Cotton! Oh, I give up!" (Cotton picks up another inflated balloon and starts to twist it. He rather distracted, however, and the balloon pops in his hand. Cut to the other two; he rises from the ground.) * [Cotton Puffy] (suddenly angry) "Stupid '--TOWER COLLAPSING--' balloon!" (This outburst has drawn the attention of the other two. Vanilla lets a block slip from his grasp, while Caramel forgets about her book altogether. Now Cotton settles happily down to his work as his siblings approach during the next line.) * [Cotton Puffy] "Well, I guess I'll make your left leg green." * [Vanilla Cake] "What did you say?" * [Caramel Cider] "Where'd ya learn that word?" * [Cotton Puffy] "Mr. Rainbow. I think it's funny." * [Vanilla Cake] "I don't know what that word means, but it sounds cool." * [Caramel Cider] "It's pretty obvious, ain't it? It's gotta be an adjective, one that describes words. Like 'great' or 'fantastic'. I'm guessin' it can be used for good and bad things." (The boys smile at each other.) * [Caramel Cider] "And you can say 'great', 'super-great', or '--BIRD CHIRPING--' 'great'." * [Cotton Puffy] "Balloons?" * [Vanilla Cake] "'--DOG BARK--' cool!" * [Cotton, Vanilla] "'--DOG BARK--' That makes sense." * [Caramel Cider] "'--DOG BARK--' Trust me. I know what I'm '--DOG BARK--' talkin' about." * [Cotton Puffy] "I '--DOG BARK--' love it!" * [Vanilla Cake] "I wanna '--YOWL--' try it! Hey, I '--DOG BARK--' did it!" (In an instant, they are circling the ceiling.) * [All three] "We love '--DOG BARK--'! It's such a great word! We love '--DOG BARK--'! It's such a great word!" (jumping on bed) "We love '--BEDSPRING TWANG--'! We love '--BEDSPRING TWANG--'!" (They collapse on the mattrass in a giggling heap. Fade to black.) (Fade in to the exterior of the castle during the day.) * [Chandelee] (from inside) "Caramel. Vanilla. Cotton. Can you guys do me a favor?" (Inside, he holds three pieces of paper and hands them to each.) * [Caramel Cider] "What can we do for ya, partner?" * [Chandelee] "I just need you guys to give these out to Sweetheart, Sir Big Rings, and Parm." * [Caramel Cider] (happily) "Oh—" * [Cotton Puffy] (ditto) "Oh—" * [Vanilla Cake] (disgustedly) "Aw—" * [All three] "—''' --DOOR SLAMMING--'!" (The comedian is caught flat-footed by these words. Then he reacts with terror.) * ['Chandelee'] "Guys! Why did you say that?!" * ['Caramel Cider'] "Say what?" (It takes a moment to get himself entirely composed, and his second action is to point at them angrily.) * ['Chandelee'] "Wait 'til mom hears about this!" * ['Caramel Cider'] "But what did we do?" * ['Chandelee'] "You know very well what you did." (''walks away with papers) "I don't need your help anyway." * [Cotton Puffy] "But Chandelee...what did we do?" (The older boy does not say anything back.) * [Cotton Puffy] "So...this is what being ignored is like." * [Vanilla Cake] "Ah, it's stupid." * [Caramel Cider] "I wonder what got into Chandelee?" (Just then, an explosion went off in one hall. The three went to go investigate and it turns out to be Jeweler-pus on the floor panting. In front of him is a jar of pickles. The trio float over to him.) * [Caramel Cider] "Jeweler-pus? What's goin' on, partner? You seem like you're strugglin'." * [Jeweler-pus] "Oh, it's a crisis of epic proportions." (holds jar up to them) "It’s lunchtime and I can’t open my pickle jar!" (The trio are irked.) * [Vanilla Cake] (grabbing jar) "The pickle jar, Jeweler-pus? The pickle jar?! I can’t believe you called us here for this! I can’t '--THROW DOWN; CRASH--' believe this!" * [Caramel Cider] (grabbing brick) "You're nothin' but a '--THROW DOWN; CRASH--' baby!" * [Cotton Puffy] (ditto) "You're so '--THROW DOWN; CRASH--' stupid!" * [Vanilla Cake] "What do you have to '--JEWELER-PUS FALLS; THUMP--' say for yourself?" (Just then, Oorameshia floats by.) * [Oorameshia] "What's going on here?" (Jeweler-pus whispers to him while pointing to the three CandyCakes. The ghost has a look of shock then glared at them. Wipe to the trio in flight, with healthy dollops of foam around their mouths—the ghost washed them out with soap. After a moment, they wipe the residue away.) * [Caramel Cider] "Ugh!" * [Cotton Puffy] "That was gross!" * [Vanilla Cake] "Yeah, what's with all that '--PASSING GEESE HONK--' soap in the mouth?" (An alarm brings them up short, and they zip down toward it. Cut to the source of the clangor: a bank that is being robbed by The Big Kappas, each are holding a sack. A customer stands behind them.) * [Machurn] "Fork it over, buddy---or else!" (A crash marks the kids' arrival; the citizens smile.) * [Caramel Cider] (from o.s.) "Or else what?" (Cut to them at the front entrance. A security guard pony sleeps in a nearby chair.) * [Caramel Cider] "Don't y'all know it ain't '--SNORE--' nice to pick on the '--SNORE--' citizens of Jupiter Town?!" * [Smog Slick] (stunned, to his brothers) "Dudes! Did she say what I think she said?" (The trio float up to the kappas.) * [Caramel Cider] "Y'all are '--GLASS BREAKING--' weirdos!" (Cut to Blue Alicorn, Red Unicorn, and Pink Pegasus. The two winged ones are flabbergasted, but Red is smiling; however, Blue Alicorn promptly levitates ear plugs into Red Unicorn's ears. Back to the three still throwing verbal punches at the kappas.) * [Vanilla Cake] "You kappas are '--GLASS BREAKING--' crazy! '--GLASS BREAKING--' off!" * [Cotton Puffy] "Yeah, take a '--GLASS BREAKING--' hike!" (Close-up of Sunflower near the back, who now looks as if he wants to removes his ears with his own hooves.) * [Caramel Cider] (from o.s.) "Leave these '--GLASS BREAKING--' nice people alone!" (Cut to Sweetheart and Dr. Cauliflower, both horrified.) * (from o.s.) "You want to '--GLASS BREAKING--' take this outside?" (Cut to the three kappas holding horrified looks. Machurn is the first to react.) * [Machurn] "Let's run, boys! Those kids are crazy!" (With that, the Kappas retreated.) * [Vanilla Cake] "Yeah, that's right! And don't let '--GLASS BREAKING-- '''karma hit you on the way home!" (The three CandyCakes turn to see a large group of disgusted citizens.) * ['Sunflower'] "Ugh, what whippersnappers." (Cut to Cotton, up near a tree's topmost branches. He has rescured a cat from its acrophobic perch and is carrying it down to ground level. Tilt down to follow him; we are near the mayor's home and he is waiting eagerly for his pet Cotton hands the animal over.) * ['Cotton Puffy'] "Now remember, when you take your kitty outside, be sure to keep him on a '--YOWL--''' leash." (Cotton was immediately biffed at the back of the head by the mayor; the boy joins his siblings in midair.) * [Vanilla Cake] "What was everybody so mad about?" * [Caramel Cider] "I don’t know. Everybody is actin' so weird." (Loud, incoherent cursing from o.s.) * [Cotton Puffy] "Do you hear that?" (Building level. Extreme close-up of the source of this yelling as it stalks across the screen and panicked screams rise from below. It is Froggy Cruiser. Back to the three.) * [Cotton Puffy] "Oh my '--CRASH--'! Somebody’s using our new word!" (Back to the frog, the camera pulled back a distance.) * [Caramel Cider] "Let's go, y'all!" (They charge.) * [Froggy Cruiser] (stopping) "Huh?" * [Caramel Cider] "Hey, you! Froggy boy! Where'd ya learn that word?" (The frog goes into an extended explanation, in like manner to its previous profanities. It seems to make sense to the trio, though.) * [Caramel Cider] "Mighty interestin'. I, uh, don't even know what those words mean, though." * [Vanilla Cake] "But they make you sound '--HELICOPTER--' awesome!" (Cut to a street corner. As Froggy curses a blue streak in the background and people run everywhere, a nun stands in the foreground and prays. Pan from the nun to Bustle and Hazele. Both have hands to their ears.) * [Bustle] "Uh, that's some rough language, eh bro?" * [Hazele] "Yep." * [Cotton Puffy] "Connect '--HONK--' to '--HONK--' word and it becomes '--HONK--'." (Cut to Scarecrow and Grim Reaper carrying white boxes. The unintelligible swearing is clearly audible to them, so much that the latter unknowingly drops the box and both take notice.) * [Scarecrow] "That sure is naughty." (The CandyCake trio again.) * [Caramel Cider] "It can also be used as a verb." * [Vanilla Cake] "Yeah, like '--HONK--'." (Down in the street, Sir Great White and his two assistants hear the swearing also. Remora promptly falls over seconds later. Back to the three.) * [Caramel Cider] "No! I ain't tellin' ya to '--HONK--'!" (Froggy disagrees vociferously—this is an argument with him. Cut to Dandelion, who crouches under a bench.) * [Dandelion] "Make it stop! Oh, my ears!" (The CandyCake trio.) * [Vanilla Cake] "And what if I did '--HONK-- '''mean it?" * ['Cotton Puffy'] "Now you're just being '--HONK--''' rude!" (Froggy shouts at them, shaking a fist.) * [Vanilla Cake] "Well, we're gonna '--HONK--'!" * [Caramel Cider] "'--HONK--'!" * [Cotton Puffy] "'--HONK--'!" (Cut to a slow pan across a group of totally speechless observers—all they can do is gasp in horror as the inaudible cursing continues—then to the trio and the frog. Pull back on this shot to frame more of the street, and Mr. Rainbow comes into the scene.) * [Mr. Rainbow] "Huh. What's going on over there?" * [Caramel Cider] (from o.s.) "That that, you '--HONK-- '''frog!" * ['Vanilla Cake'] (''from o.s.) "Eat my '--HONK--'!" * [Cotton Puffy] (from o.s.) "I will '--HONK--' end you!" * [Caramel Cider] (from o.s.) "You think you're so '--HONK--' tough, huh? Well, I think you're a '--HONK--' weakling, you little '--HONK--'!" (Throughout the previous four lines, Mr. Rainbow shows an expression of shock and utter mortification. Cut to the trio and Froggy; he shouts a few more unprintable things at them. Mr. Rainbow, meanwhile, has got himself back under controll, and is not happy in the slightest.) * [Mr. Rainbow] "CARAMEL CIDER!! VANILLA CAKE!! COTTON PUFFY!! GET DOWN HERE RIGHT NOW!!" (Back to the three on the end of this. They are spoiling for more action, but their father's voice snaps them out of it.) * [All three] "Daddy?" * [Caramel Cider] "Could ya excuse for a sec, Froggy?" (They zip to him.) * [Caramel Cider] "What's goin' on, pa?" * [Vanilla Cake] "We're a little busy." * [Mr. Rainbow] "I am very angry with all three of you." (A crowd starts to gather behind them.) * [All three] "What for?" * [Mr. Rainbow] "That word you’re using is not a good word. It’s naughty." (The three start to play dumb.) * [Caramel Cider] "What word?" * [Cotton Puffy] "We used a lot of words today." * [Mr. Rainbow] "You know—that one you keep using over and over." (tapping his head) "Think real hard." * [Vanilla Cake] " 'The'? " * [Cotton Puffy] " 'You'? " * [Caramel Cider] "We used both of them words a lot." * [Mr. Rainbow] "No, not those. Those are great. It’s that other one." * [Caramel Cider] " 'Bad'? That ain't good. Is that it?" * [Mr. Rainbow] "No, that new one." * [Cotton Puffy] "Ohhh! You mean '--HONK--'! I learned that from you, daddy." (Cut to the now-angry crowd; he continues o.s.) "You’re always teaching us new stuff." (Back to the family.) * [Mr. Rainbow] (chuckling nervously, glancing toward crowd) "Oh, well, that can’t be right." (hustling kids o.s.) "Uh, let’s go over here and figure out where you really learned that word. Must be cable." (leaning into view) "We just got cable." (He approaches the kids, who are now gathered by a stopped car, and forces a cheery tone into his voice—even though he knows exactly what started all the sailor talk.) * [Mr. Rainbow] (over shoulder) "We’ll get to the bottom of this." (kneeling, sotto voice) "Now, kids, I need to explain something to you. I should never have used that word. It’s very bad, and I’m very sorry. It’s not the kind of language kids your age should never use." (loudly, over shoulder) "Uh, I don’t know where you heard it, but it’s a naughty, naughty word!" (The crowd is nonplussed; he lowers his voice and turns back to the three.) * [Mr. Rainbow] "What that word really means is…" (As he starts to whisper, cupping a hand to his mouth, they float in closer to hear more clearly. After a moment, their eyes go so wide that they look as if they might pop from the sockets.) * [All three] (totally horrified) "No!" (Mr. Rainbow gets up.) * [Cotton Puffy] "Oh, no! I’m a potty-mouth!" (Froggy starts to curse.) * [Caramel Cider] "We have some unfinished business, y'all!" (Froggy is sitting on a bench, croaking and holding out one hand as if to say "Bring it on".) * [Caramel Cider] "We hafta teach that potty-mouth a lesson!" (The trio charge. Parked on the street is a big truck loaded with milk. This is hoisted away by Cotton and Vanilla. Caramel rushes in and lands a blow to Froggy's head, causing him to let off a fresh string of foul language. Her brothers stuffed a bottle to his mouth, and prompts to drink from it and Froggy lays on his back and sucks on it like a baby drinking from a bottle.) * [Caramel Cider] "That should be a lesson to you, Froggy, that certain words are a no-no." * [Cotton Puffy] "Especially for nice kids like us." * [Caramel Cider] "Now, you get a time-out to think about what you’ve done." (Cut to an unoccupied patch of land at an intersection. Two of its edges face the sidewalks, while the other two are formed by very tall buildings that stand nearby. Froggy sits into view, his back partially turned to the camera, and still drinks from the bottle while facing this "corner".) * [Caramel Cider] (from o.s.) "When ya realize yer mistake, you can come back and we’ll discuss a proper punishment." (Froggy stops drinking and croaks halfheartedly over his shoulder. Back to the three.) * [Vanilla Cake] "Less talking, more '--HONK--' thinking!" * [Caramel Cider] "You too, Vanilla!" * [Vanilla Cake] "WHAT?!" (Cut to him sulking and sitting beside Froggy while having a fresh mouthful of soap spilling down his chin.) End of episode.